Letter to Myself

Dearest Charlene,

You HAVE to do this. You can't cheat here and there and everywhere and expect this to work. You can lie to others, but you can't lie to yourself. And, you're only hurting YOURSELF. Remember what it felt like at 240? Remember how much happier and how much more beautiful you felt? Remember how much BETTER you felt? You can have that again. You MUST have that again. This is not a dress rehearsal. This your life, and this is your chance to change your life for the better. Yes, you have a wonderful husband. Yes, you have wonderful family and friends. And, yes, you currently are healthy, but what about in five short years? Ten years? You know what your goals are, and look what you've done with NAMI! You can be so much more than you are! What are you waiting for? Stumbling sometimes is alright, but you CANNOT have this mentality of a cheat here and a cheat there. You simply CAN'T. As Steven tells you, there is no "try", only "do". And, you can DO this. You have to. Now, start keeping that food log! You've done so well with starting to eat salad and drinking water. Plan things and STICK TO IT! You will not starve, and you will not die. Stop preparing, "Oh my God, do I have enough food to get me through the day?" You have enough to live on, trust me. Hang in there. I love you, and you can do this.

Trying to love you
more every day,
Me